A friend of mine asked me about stress before. I tell him, I don't really have stress in my life, so I am not really sure about how stress feel like. Today, I had felt the stress and pressure for myself. It was shocking, scary and worrying... It make me lost my appetite to eat dinner...
I don't blame anyone but I just feel ashamed that I am so weak. My supervisor is going to out of town for a week. Have I not make myself ready for this? The moment she passed on her things to me, the moment I were have to takeover some of the responsibilities. So sudden that I feel I have a lot of burdens, I have lots and lots... tonned of work I need to do... I am so worried that I couldn't handle all of those things... I wished badly I can stayed there till late to do whatever I can to catch up the work but I gotta go for class... wanted to cry it out but I manage to hold it to myself. Lost my appetite to eat, lost my mood to go class, spammed quite some emo post in facebook in less than 5 minutes, I went to class for less than 1 hour and I left to go home. Sorry for giving a bad impression to Mr Goh, my lecturer.
I am feeling much calm after I reach home. Now that I realize my responsibilities wasn't even that heavy compare to my manager. Somehow, I feel I should take this good opportunity to train myself, also to proof myself to my upperhand that I can still handle the stress. I need courage, I need motivation, I need to be stronger, I need to grow up!
Felt much better after I had a small talk with room mate, appreciate it very much, thanks!
That 'dark' moment I had just now, so many thoughts had passed through my mind. Perhaps I was just tired. I am now back home at 8.46pm. I am gonna sleep early and take a good rest tonight. Don't want to let my manager down. Tomorrow gonna fight, fight, FIGHT!!!
Wish me luck! I can do this!
I don't blame anyone but I just feel ashamed that I am so weak. My supervisor is going to out of town for a week. Have I not make myself ready for this? The moment she passed on her things to me, the moment I were have to takeover some of the responsibilities. So sudden that I feel I have a lot of burdens, I have lots and lots... tonned of work I need to do... I am so worried that I couldn't handle all of those things... I wished badly I can stayed there till late to do whatever I can to catch up the work but I gotta go for class... wanted to cry it out but I manage to hold it to myself. Lost my appetite to eat, lost my mood to go class, spammed quite some emo post in facebook in less than 5 minutes, I went to class for less than 1 hour and I left to go home. Sorry for giving a bad impression to Mr Goh, my lecturer.
I am feeling much calm after I reach home. Now that I realize my responsibilities wasn't even that heavy compare to my manager. Somehow, I feel I should take this good opportunity to train myself, also to proof myself to my upperhand that I can still handle the stress. I need courage, I need motivation, I need to be stronger, I need to grow up!
Felt much better after I had a small talk with room mate, appreciate it very much, thanks!
That 'dark' moment I had just now, so many thoughts had passed through my mind. Perhaps I was just tired. I am now back home at 8.46pm. I am gonna sleep early and take a good rest tonight. Don't want to let my manager down. Tomorrow gonna fight, fight, FIGHT!!!
Wish me luck! I can do this!
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